Archive | July, 2013

guilt, uselessness, and two kinds of bikes

31 Jul

“Your guilt-meter is so jacked up”….actually said to me by my shrink today. She pulls no punches and I love that. We talked about guilt, which seems to be a theme in my life. I am full of “shoulds”…I should feel this way, I should act that way, I should believe such and such, I should do this, I shouldn’t do that…and when I don’t feel or act or do what I’ve been conditioned to think that I “should”, I subsequently feel guilty about it. Sheesh. What’s wrong with just being me? Authentic, real, guilt free, ME. Is that so awful? We also discussed freedom and flexibility, relationships, and motorcycles.

I’ve decided that I’m feeling useless lately. I don’t talk about my job here but its in a weird place (figuratively) and is the root of much of this useless feeling. So I’m trying to fulfill that need elsewhere with my volunteering (which also serves as a distraction) and extracurricular activities I suppose. I just want to feel like I’m doing something helpful, fulfilling, and not lame. That’s all I wanna be really…not lame.

This weekend I will be taking a two day long class in order to get my motorcycle license. Yes mom and dad, you read that correctly. I am a nervous wreck (pun intended) and a skeered lil’ girl. But, I am doing this! I have ridden with The Accountant and have walked and coasted a tiny bit by myself on his bike but never actually driven it myself. I can however, ride a bicycle so I have totally got this. Right? Right. Which is a nice segue into my next bit o’ news…

I’m getting a road bike, as in the kind that you pedal. A friend and I are going to the bike shop next week just to look and maybe get me measured, although we could do that part ourselves. But I know nothing about them and my friend knows a lot about them. I have connections folks. I’ve decided that I want to add some variety to my fitness routine and running is hard on the body so this will give my joints a break and some new way to get hurt. Haha. Another friend has mentioned doing a duathlon with her but that is far far far in the future. It is nice to think about though. For now, I’ll get a decent used starter bike and go from there. Total newbie here so advice and input welcome.

Rawk on.

 

 

Rainy run

30 Jul

Rainy CentennialToday’s run was much much much better than my last one. My only goal was to finish the scheduled training day (5 min run/1 min walk for 48 min, plus warm up/cool down) without crapping out.

Goal accomplished.

4.1 miles in the rain. Have I mentioned how much I love running in the rain? Minus any lightning of course. It just feels…good.

Oh, and the foot…did just fine! *happy dance*

I know I am such a dork for taking pics of my runs but I like noticing things as I plod by and thinking, that would make a nice photo. And then I share them with you crazies. I figure, if I’m writing about my life with words, why not write about it with pictures too?

the latest on my reading plate

30 Jul

Screen Shot 2013-07-30 at 3.15.43 PMJust finished Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer. I’d tried it once, dropped it, and then picked it up again a few months later. I gave it 5 stars. Its been a while since a book has made me cry and this one did towards the end. Not that it’s exactly difficult to make me cry, but for a book to do so, that’s a feat. I thought the author aptly captured the perspective of a 9 year old boy who had lost his father in 9/11. Interwoven with drama between Oskar’s grandmother and grandfather years before in Dresden and later, in New York, the story unfolds in a heart wrenching, personal tale of a boy searching for something. Closure maybe. Forgiveness perhaps. An excellent read. Thus, my review.

Next up is Let’s Pretend This Never Happened by Jenny Lawson and It Starts with Food by Dallas and Melissa Hartwig.

Screen Shot 2013-07-30 at 3.26.05 PMScreen Shot 2013-07-30 at 3.15.18 PM

brain float

30 Jul

Today = the dentist = nitrous oxide = I AM THE MOST HILARIOUS PERSON IN THE UNIVERSE. For about 40 minutes anyway.

Some thoughts while floating…

  • Don’t stop breathing, keep breathing, take the deepest breaths you have ever taken in your life, don’t waste this precious sh!t.
  • Oh wow, hands and feet are so numb…OMG do I even HAVE hands and feet???
  • I must be the most tense person on earth because I am not this relaxed and loose even while sleeping.
  • Don’t laugh, do not laugh, do not effin’ laugh.
  • Isn’t the color green hysterical??
  • Hygienist asks if I want to buy some sort of fluoride home treatment gel…I hear “do you want to buy Florence and the Machine”…well of course I do…I LOVE HER!!!…You mean I can take them home with me???….YES!!!….I’ll take 20!!!
  • And so on…

Good times, good times.

city pics

30 Jul

Some photos I like from Sunday’s outing.

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Nashville1

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Nashville5  Nashville7

Yesterday’s workout

29 Jul

Because you care.

I decided to give the foot another day off. Plus, I’m scared I will go crazy if I run on it and it acts ugly so I’m delaying expected disappointment. Such a great attitude I have, I know.

Anyway, the gym was good for me as it always is. Mind clearing and blood pumping and stress reducing. Good stuff!

Tonight…an attempted run I hope.

Walking:
0:23:15.3 || 1.3 mi || 17:21.5 min/mi || flat

Cycling (stationary):
0:45:00 || 10.6 mi || 3.5 %

Machine Seated Row:
30 lb x 10 reps
30 lb x 10 reps
30 lb x 10 reps

Reverse Grip Triceps Pushdown:
20 lb x 20 reps
20 lb x 20 reps
20 lb x 20 reps

Machine Bicep Curls:
20 lb x 3 reps
10 lb x 10 reps
10 lb x 10 reps
10 lb x 10 reps

Machine Chest Press:
30 lb x 10 reps
30 lb x 10 reps
30 lb x 10 reps

Leg Extensions:
20 lb x 10 reps
20 lb x 10 reps
20 lb x 10 reps

Seated Leg Curl:
30 lb x 12 reps
30 lb x 12 reps
30 lb x 12 reps

Sprayground fun

29 Jul

Kiddo loves spray parks and we are lucky to have some great ones close by. Yesterday afternoon we ventured to Cumberland Park in Nashville. It was the perfect day for it, not to hot, not too sunny (although I did get a little crispy on my nose and forehead). The park is beautiful, with lovely views of the city. Hopefully we’ll go back at least once or twice more before summer is over. Here’s some shots.

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