Today I did something that ranks in the top three dumbest things I’ve ever done. Being something of a scatterbrain, I do a lot of dumb things. I lose my keys at least three times a week, put toothpaste in the refrigerator, go the wrong way coming out of stores in the mall, can't find my... Continue Reading →
Therapy: On Feeling Better
My latest therapy session was a good one. We spent a lot of time talking about simply wanting to feel better and using that as motivation rather than relying on a number on the scale or the size of my pants to dictate my mood. I'm feeling all of my 42 years plus about 10... Continue Reading →
Since You’ve Been Gone
I can breathe for the first time...Just kidding. After about a year's absence I kinda just have to start over here. Here are the major highlights: I started a new job! 🙂 Our dog died. 😦 I restarted and then quit grad school. Again. 😦 I've gained about 20 pounds. 😦 One out of four... Continue Reading →
the place
Sometimes you're in the middle of folding laundry and are watching Abstract: The Art of Design on Netflix at the same time and thinking about how you've been in this really weird frustrating place for the past several days. It's a place you find yourself over and over again, probably once every couple of months... Continue Reading →
managing time
My time management skills are the pits. As are my organizational skills, which I feel would be much better if my time management skills were better. Or maybe it's the other way around? Which came first, the organized Finn or the efficient Finn? Half the time I feel like I'm barely keeping it together without... Continue Reading →
the nothing that turned into a post
I think of a jillion things to write about here during the day or when I'm in the shower or otherwise not at the keyboard. Then when I sit down to write, my mind goes blank and all I can think of is what I ate for lunch or what I did at work today.... Continue Reading →
humble pie for breakfast
Its 5:00 am and entirely too quiet, too dark, and too cold for the madness that is me getting up to go for a wog (walk/jog) this morning. The argument in my head was of the classic angel vs devil variety. My Head: Its a new day! Go wog. You'll be glad you did. My... Continue Reading →
The ADD is strong with this one
I cannot sit still today y'all. Cannot focus. Cannot stand the confines of this cubicle. I am fidgety. Whew. I'm making lists and thinking of things I need and want to do and getting not much of anything done in this whole chaotic process that's swirling in my head. I will look into mind-quieting meditation...... Continue Reading →
weird energy
The best intentions... I meant to walk myself, or at least the dog when I got home from work but one thing led to another (read errands, homework, kid bedtime) and next thing I know I'm waking up next to Kiddo and it's 3:00am. I can't get back to sleep so I utilize this bizarre... Continue Reading →
unsure
Random...Here's a photo I took of a llama...Or an alpaca...Some sort of camelid anyway. I think he/she is pretty cool...yep, so very random. This blog y'all...I neglect it for long periods of time because I get confused about what to do with it...what I want it to be...how I want to frame things here. And... Continue Reading →
an entire post about my hair
The hair y'all. If you know me at all, you know that my hair is a thang. I bore easily in general, so I tend to change up the coif frequently and it's been many many many colors and cuts and spiky and slicked back and boy short usually. However, for whatever reason, primarily additional... Continue Reading →
a gold pin and other things
Yesterday I made a last minute adjustment to my plans to return to work and decided to go back home after dropping kiddo at camp. I had a "me" day and it was glorious. The electricity was going off and on most of the morning and I may or may not have been stuck outside... Continue Reading →
funny and serious
I was reading something the other day that stuck in my brain and made me want to "write it out". What's that saying about never letting anyone determine your self worth? Something like that. I make mistakes. Sometimes the same ones repeatedly. And there are times that I feel like I have imparted grace to... Continue Reading →
snippets
My workouts haven't happened in about a week. Remedied that tonight with a 5K run/walk. I didn't eat well today and kind of lost energy and heart about midway through. Meh. Hot, humid, and slow, but done. I got a direct message from our county library (or at least the social media person) that kind... Continue Reading →
weirdo beardo feardo
Its late. I just woke up feeling a bit panicky. That hasn't happened in a couple of weeks. Nothing I can't handle, just, feelings. The phrase "fake it till ya make it" popped into my head. True words. Watched a few clips from Amelie because I'm weird like that and there's something soothing to me... Continue Reading →
this is why i’m in therapy folks
Texts this morning from yet another friend who is struggling for different reasons. Sometimes people are incredibly mean, closed minded, and heartless in their well-meaning-ness, if that makes any sense. I know life is difficult and there are struggles to be had. Its not all peachy keen, hunky dory, sunshine, rainbows, and unicorns, but I... Continue Reading →
Heeeeeey 2am
Brain won't shut off or shut up. Sometimes it screams at me, things I don't want or need to hear. Or maybe I do, I don't even know. I was going to text a friend who would get it but my cell service seems to be down. Throat is feeling a tad swollen so I'm... Continue Reading →
head meet ache meet perspective
No workout tonight. My head is splitting. Pain. I'm guessing a combo of being a girl (yay, lucky me, men are stupid*, don't look at me in that tone of voice, etc), and the fact that I ate weirdly and non-healthily today. And did I mention the cramps? TMI? Oh, I'm sorry but this is... Continue Reading →
Life isn’t like the movies, and how do babies get outta there
Frances Ha. 9 out of 10 stars. At first I found the dialogue a bit disjointed and awkward but I don't know if I just got used to it or it appealed to me more after it settled in my brain after sleeping on it. Shot in black and white, it was lovely to look... Continue Reading →
shrinkage…
...of the head. Therapy of the mental sort continues once or twice a month. I just got back from today's session. I started about a year ago this April. It has been both helpful and confusing and disturbing and unsettling and amazing. The benefits and enlightenment that comes from being able to talk to a... Continue Reading →
Testy
I'm on a short fuse today for one reason or another. Its Sunday, so by this time every weekend I've responded to 20 gazillion calls of "mommy mommy" and my patience is taxed. I know that I am kiddo's whole world at this stage in her life so I try to keep perspective and channel... Continue Reading →
too much
3:00 AM seems to be my time. My time to what, I don"t know exactly, just "my time". I didn't mean to fall asleep on kiddo's floor (yet again) but here I am. Eating Honey Nut Cheerios from the box and struggling to remember my WordPress password because I don't log in as much as... Continue Reading →
wah wah wah
so i hate it when i stay up too late watching stupid pointless tv and/or staring into space (wow, it occurs to me that i do a lot of staring. hello stinkeye) and then i finally pass out in full makeup and without brushing my teeth so i wake up with my face all greasy... Continue Reading →
staring
It has not been the best of weekends. Kiddo got violently ill on the way home Thursday, requiring an impromptu pit stop along the interstate to clean her up best I could and get home asap. It was gross and pitiful and made me cry when she stared at me with her little lip quivering... Continue Reading →
you know that feeling when you know you should go to bed because its really late but you don't want to because your mind is whirling and you can't shut your brain off, plus you're not really sleepy and are just in that dreamy state of mind where random bizarre thoughts pop into your head... Continue Reading →